March 2012
4 tags
Typical AP kid.
AP kid: Omg. I have so many tests. Omg, I'm gonna' fail. Omg. I'm not ready. Ugh. Why did I take so many AP classes!!!!!
*Gets A's on all tests*
Tried that, she got out. So we decided to keep...
wellhi replied to your photo: Guess who I get to babysit!
Put it in the oven,
3 tags
This happened yesterday while I was in WalMart.
Male cashier with multiple tattoos (two of them are colored in with rainbow): How are you this evening?
Me: Pretty good. Starving, obviously. How are you?
Cashier: Not bad. I can't wait to get off my shift and get home to my boyfriend.
Woman behind me: Wait, you're gay?
Cashier: Yeah. . . ?
Woman: That's a shame.
Me: Why?
Woman: He seemed like such a wonderful man, it's a shame he's gay.
Cashier: Why is it a shame?
Woman: It's wrong! It's immoral, it's dis-
Me: Excuse me, but what's it to you if he's gay?
Woman: It's offensive!
Me: But how does it affect you?
Woman: What?
Me: Where exactly does it start to make sense that it affects you? A relationship is between 2 people, not 3.
Woman: *sputters a bit, then leaves without her food*
Cashier: . . . Wow, thank you.
Me: Ignorant people are the reason I claim to be allergic to the human race.
February 2012
Banker’s 1% Tip is a Hoax; Real Receipt Obtained →
socialistexan:
jenara-shepard:
Welp.
AND HE TIPPED MORE THAN 10%. HA.
This is a form of argument known as making an...
theyhadtreestohangtheirhope reblogged your photo: I agree with the logic, but I want to see the…
block
WTF does evolution have…do with minority rights? OH RIGHT NOTHING.
WatchOn behalf of “my” country, I apologize.
“Only the French could lose a battle to furniture.”
– Best youtube comment about Beauty and the Beast. (via comiccombatant)
Anonymous asked: Oh okay sorry. Well we don't know each other much. Like we've talked maybe five to ten times before. We know each others names and some hobbies but not much beyond that.
Anonymous asked: Today the guy i like hugged me and said, "I love you," but apparently he is really friendly, so I didn't know what to say so I said, "okay." IS THIS A BAD THING? What if he was serious? What should I do?
Anonymous asked: oh my god that forever alone thing is 200% accurate
Why I (a gay guy) will be forever alone:
Attractive boy: Hi! I'm famous and completely inaccessible.
Attractive boy: Hi! I'm straight, so the only serious relationship we'll ever have begins with a "b".
Attractive boy: Hi! I'm a douchebag, and for the most part you'll just be a really awesome fleshlight to me.
Attractive boy: Hi! I'm twice your age, so most people will assume we're related and that'll make any kind of PDA painfully awkward.
Attractive boy: Hi! I'm a lot younger than you. Jail anyone?
Attractive boy: Hi! I'm taken and/or blissfully happy without you.
Attractive boy: Hi! I'm going to friend-zone you. Good luck not developing feelings for me while I depend on you for everything except romance!
Attractive boy: Hi! I live on the other side of the world.
Attractive boy: Hi! I'm not even the slightest bit interested in you because you're too tall, or too short, or too skinny, or too fat, or too fem, or too masc, or too boring, or too outgoing, or I don't like your skin color, or I think your hair is gross, or some other reason that will make you feel like there's something or several things terribly wrong with you.
Dear Boston University and every other school I...
whitepoweralejandra:
Please just fucking tell me I didn’t get in already you fucking pricks. Why are you prolonging the anticipation it’s so painful you stupid admission bitches.
Spencer, you're terrible.
wellhi replied to your post: My love life is drier than a post-menopausal woman’s vagina.
Makes me think of prunes.
9 tags
My love life is drier than a post-menopausal...
7kevin11:
the most action I get is “coughing” for my doctor
Watchan-orgasm-moth:
da fook’s that?
Kangaroo mouse?
6 tags
Ugh.
Have to go to Mexicali for the weekend. Which means a pit-stop in El Centro. Hooray.
